Rainy Days and Mondays - Beware the Repeat

When writing your story, take careful note of how often you start sentences with the same word. If your main character’s name is Simon, it is not necessary to start each sentence about him with his name. At the same time, you don’t want to start each sentence with ‘he’ or ‘his’ either. It is possible to convey to the reader who the paragraph is about without starting with these words - although you do want to have the characters name towards the beginning of the paragraph.

Example

Simon turned and rose from his crouched position. His lips formed the word danger to his companions, but no sound passed them. He motion for them to follow through the rising mist. His senses opened. He strained to hear or see any sign of the beast they tracked. He had glimpsed its form through the trees earlier and now feared it was heading for the nearby village. Simon’s heart ached as he thought of his beloved sister Emily. He thought of the terrible damage done to her, body and soul, by the foul animal she mistakenly called husband. Simon’s need for vengeance raged through him. He would put an end to its mockery of life. It would be dead before it could continue its blood-fuelled rampage.

Simon turned and rose from his crouched position. The word danger formed on his lips, but no sound reached his companions. He motion for them to follow through the rising mist. Senses open and straining to hear or see any sign of the beast they tracked. Earlier, he glimpsed its form through the trees and now feared it was heading for the nearby village. His heart ached as he thought of his beloved sister Emily. Thoughts of the terrible damage done to her, body and soul, by the foul animal she mistakenly called husband. Need for vengeance raged through him. There would be an end to its mockery of life. It would be dead before it could continue its blood-fuelled rampage.

Okay, the first paragraph has 126 words, the second 121. So it doesn’t take much in the way of extra or fewer words to eliminate all of the he, he, he, his, his, Simon, Simon’s. For me, the flow of this paragraph is much easier to follow with the varying sentence starters.

You should also be aware of this with paragraph starts. Look through your story or novel. See if there are paragraphs within close proximity to each other that start with the same word. Especially if it is an unusual word like ‘incidental’, sometimes, it can leave the reader feeling as though they have lost their place and returned to the previous paragraph. It’s important to keep the flow of reading going, and having a reader stop to check their place interrupts this.

One more thing about repeats, when describing something, like a storm or a race, it is easy to use the object you are describing frequently. More so if it is something unique. This makes it even more important to be aware of the words you choose. And don’t forget to make certain all of your characters don’t grin with delight or their eyes don’t all twinkle mischievously. Use your thesaurus. It will open up a whole new world of verbal delights for you.

Rain :)

Sunday PicNic ~ Unforgettable Characters

Have you ever read a book and after a week or two, found it difficult to remember much about it? Sigh…

As writers, we don’t want to pour our passion into a manuscript of forgettable pages. We want our readers to drink in our story, savor its flavor, and remember it. How do we do that? By asking questions.

Think of a favorite book you’ve read; a novel that stands out in your mind. Is it a favorite because it’s written with a unique flair? Do you cherish it for its exquisite scenery, crafty dialogue, shocking twist or ending? No—more than likely, you love the book because you love the people who dwell inside it. 

Characters make a book memorable.

As a teenager, I reluctantly began reading William Golding’s Lord of the Flies for a school assignment. Soon after being introduced to Ralph and Piggy, I unsuspectingly became invested in this symbolic classic.

The British choirboys became real to me. I became sympathetic to Ralph, the protagonist. He tried to establish order and focused on the rescue of his fellow plane crash survivors; displaying humanness while others became frenzied, animalistic jungle hunters. I was also sensitive to the welfare of Piggy, an intellectual orphan boy, teased for his pudgy frame and thick glasses. He was an outsider to the others, yet became a confidant and sidekick to Ralph’s leadership role. They both shared their inner selves with each other, and developed a true friendship. They developed a relationship with me too. I shook in fear and cried with them; and now, decades later, I remember them.

As writers, we need to ask questions. We must explore the characters we create. What makes them different? What makes them vulnerable? What faults do they have? Are they happy, grumpy, smart, or overweight? Do they have particular goals? Do they walk with a limp? Did they have happy childhoods? Are they wealthy? These are questions, among hundreds of others, we should ask our characters. We need to learn their distinctive physical traits, establish their inward and outward personas, and share their qualities (good and bad) with our readers. The more we reveal about our characters and why they do the things they do, the easier it is for readers to connect with them, and the more memorable they will become. If we fall in love with our characters, chances are, our readers will too.

~Nic

SumShine Saturday~*~Ending an affair with a book.

Every time I finish a book, I miss writing about the people, events and feelings throughout the story. It is with a certain sadness that I must type the last two words ... The End.

With a heavy heart, I usually start writing another book to ease the empty feeling of "now what do I do?". Guess what happens every time? I discover new worlds, eras, and most of all, fresh characters to infuse with life.

I smile, knowing readers will see the world I created--through my character's eyes. Sometimes I write by the seat of my pants. (Okay,  I always do that, but it works for me.) I know the way each book begins and ends, but I leave it up to my characters to fill in the middle.

All I have to do is sit at my keyboard and allow my characters to write the story. Odd as that sounds, I have a feeling every author can relate.

Can you relate? I'd love to read your feedback.

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Wednesday Wonderings - Book Review: Room

• Paperback: 336 pages
• Publisher: Picador (23 Dec 2010)
• ISBN-10: 0330519026
• ISBN-13: 978-0330519021
• Product Dimensions: 19.6 x 13 x 2.8 cm
• Average Customer Review: 4.2 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (297 customer reviews)
• Amazon Bestsellers Rank: 3 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)
• #2 in Books > Fiction > Contemporary Fiction

Jack is five. He lives in a single, locked room with his Ma.

I have written a lot of book reviews, and never before have I been more stumped on what to say. If anyone has read The Other Hand (recently re-released as Little Bee) by Chris Cleave, they will know from the jacket that there is no blurb for the book. All they say is it is a remarkable read, but they don’t want to say too much or it will spoil things for the reader.

This is the same case for Room.

Room is the most unique book I have read in a long time. It took my breath away. In a lot of ways, it reminded me of The Boy In The Stripped Pyjamas, with a young boy leading us through the story.

The character of five-year-old Jack was moving and sweet, head-strong and stubborn. A bit like any child, really. Except Jack isn’t like other children his age.

We get to see the world through Jack’s eyes – how simplistic things really are, and how complicated Outside can be.

The use of language in the novel is truly perfect – every word, every sentence, constructed as though by Jack himself. It pulls the reader into his world, and before you know it, you feel like you’re seeing Outside with brand new eyes, too.

I cannot recommend this book enough. But like the jacket for The Other Hand, I won’t say too much. I will say that Room will take you on a wild journey of emotions and can guarantee it will keep you up at night. You’ll see the best and worst of humanity, the scary parts of the world. And I dare anyone not to agree with Jack that a lot of the world is just a repeat. A truly haunting read. 

Rainy Days and Mondays - Where you from?

Dialect: a regional variety of language distinguished by features of vocabulary, grammar, and pronunciation from other regional varieties and constituting together with them a single language.

Great, so how do you get a dialect across in your writing? The best way I’ve found is by using the KISS theory. Keep It Simple Stupid. There is no need to start rattling off Scottish or Spanish phrases to prove your character is from another country. In fact, since it’s a braw, bricht, moonlicht th nicht, why don’t we explore this a bit more?

Did you just stumble a bit there? Probably, I know I did even as I wrote it. (Scottish translation courtesy Pamela Wench – it’s a cold, bright, moonlit night tonight) A few key words will let the reader know this person is from somewhere else without making them struggle to find meaning in the words. Stumbling your way through an accent so thick you would have trouble understanding it even if it were read aloud to you, can turn your readers off – fast. Personally, I read fiction for the pleasure of becoming lost in a world of someone else’s creation, not for language lessons.

Example

“Wipe that silly smirk off your face, I will not be found like this!” Her voice came out in a strangled hiss. She tried to make her way to the far side of the stream, to the concealment the bushes there offered.

Iain found himself chuckling, “Och, tis a fine temper ye have. I knew yer passions would run deep.”

A mischievous grin hovered near the corner of her mouth, one brow cocked. “Not as deeply as yours. Now help me out before the whole of the world knows what we have been doing.”

Pleasure at her unabashed response filled him and turned his chuckle into a laugh. He boosted her up onto the steep edge, taking the time to give her bottom a gentle caress. “Dinnae wander too far. I still have questions only ye can answer. Ye ken?”

The man is from Scotland, the woman from England. His every word does not ooze Scotland, but enough do for the imagination to seize on them and fill in the rest. I’ve chosen to leave out the accent for her so I don’t overwhelm readers with two distinct dialects. For her I try to convey her nationality by how she phrases things. So, there are various ways to express different accents and varying degrees of them as well.

Use the internet. There are so many sources out there for writers. Just Google, ‘How to write with a (fill in the blank) accent’ and search through what comes up. Tap any friends you have who have lived, or been to the place you want to capture. Getting a dialect right can add another layer of reading pleasure, putting the reader in a whole different environment and giving them the chance to travel vicariously to new locales.

Whether your characters are from Brooklyn, the Deep South, Rome or England, let a bit of their local color shine through in how they speak. Just a touch will do.

Rain :)

Sunday PicNic ~ Rain's Reign (Poem)

There’s nothing like the taste of rain;
the sprinkling drops delight my tongue.
Beyond the biting wintry days,
the long awaited spring has sprung.

The sprinkling drops delight my tongue
and splash upon my upturned face.
I’m bathed with heaven’s cloud cascade
and clothed in glistening liquid lace.

Beyond the biting wintry days,
when waking earth is vernal-kissed,
the warming clouds spill beads of joy.
I relish in the mist I’ve missed.

Sumshine Saturday~*~Through the Wringer

Impatient for the washer to finish, I lifted the lid.  I watched the clothes slowly come to a stop, and wished my life would come out of a spin cycle, if only for a day.

Does creative energy dissipate when life whips insanity into the mix? No, I can't say it does. Not for this writer anyway.

Writing about the day, be it a happy or hectic, puts things in perspective.  Stress seems to release its clutch on my insides and flows from my mind, spilling its agony, craziness or pure ecstasy onto my paper. Usually, while scribbling the events of the day in my journal, an idea sparks… then flames.

 Burning to create whatever my mind just conjured, I flip open my laptop and begin to type, forgetting about the spin cycle of life. That is what is so great about the life of a writer. Stress is a means to a wonderful novel, blog or short story.

When you feel like pulling your hair out (or someone elses) try starting a story instead. You'll feel better and create something to share.